When You’re Home…

Surabaya, December 24, 2011

[I’m writing this on Christmas Eve in Surabaya, Indonesia at around 9 PM. It shall be noted that I planned to spend my Christmas and New Year holiday in this city. But a greater plan has to be fulfilled. Would go back to Jakarta tomorrow morning. An uncle of mine passed away this morning. Who would have thought that the Christmas atmosphere could be tainted in such a way? So unexpectedly. I’m happy for him, though. It’s always good to be home on Christmas day.]

Behind every closed door, a mystery left unfold; a story, untold. You may clench your eyes shut, yet a whiff of hope could never be denied.

Let me clear each tear from your eye and maybe sing you a lullaby. Let my heartbeat be your guide to a cure inside.

That terrible moment when you feel like you would love to let go of your shadow to go the place where you want to be the most, to see someone you want to see the most. But then you choose to be invisible and hide behind the Christmas tree. Too scared to wait for every dream to come true; the desire to wait under the mistletoe, disregarded. Oh, start wishing again, Self. Be renewed. Live in hope. And get surprised.

Kiss the Planet Goodbye

Here we go again.

[I'm craving for my love's embrace. Whenever I lay myself down, my heart drops, piercing through my backbone, fell deep into  the immensity of dazzling candor. Everything about you speeds up my heart rate. Out of restlessness, out of unruly peace and ecstasy. Something about you, my heart may skip a beat. In a blink of an eye, fantasy turns to dust. By will, dust turns to clay. ]

On Friday, October 28, 2011, Owl City was amazing. Didn’t get the chance to memorize all of his songs, how unfortunate. The only song I could sing along so well was Alligator Sky.

Oh, telescope, keep an eye on my only hope lest I blink and be swept off the narrow road.

Hercules, you’ve got nothing to say to me ’cause you’re not the blinding light that I need.

‘Twas Hari Sumpah Pemuda, mass riot everywhere. Overcast ever since the sun rose. Basic gloom. Excitement in disguise. Was in absolute doubt whether to go to the concert or not. Have been looking forward to see Adam Young. Not a HUGE fan, but I definitely admire him with all my heart. Adam is superbly amazing. No need to be a fan to love him. You listen to his songs, and every word he sings melts  your soul and encrusts your heart with sweet delight.

Another Side of Someday

Shall we let the mystery unwind?

Less Than Three

You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it.  But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.

- Jessica (8 y.o.)

Gone in September

I said I love you in the summer.

Blown Away

Every fleeting memory kisses my very soul.

Every rose I hold in my hand will wither away one by one. All that I would have eons from now may only be shattered pieces of dried needles and leaflets. Yet shadows of beauty carries on in mind. Trifles of verity within pretense yesterday. Thorns of hope whilst heart made whole today. Dreams come true tomorrow, nonetheless. Oh, tomorrow I love you.

‘Twas August 17, 1945.

That day when our tongues may proclaim, “MERDEKA!”

Today’s my beloved Indonesia is celebrating her 66th birthday. I was supposed to attend a flag ceremony at my university yet due to the fact that I don’t have any white shirt in my closet, forget it. Well, to be honest, I was purely lethargic. I planned to wake up late this morning. The absence of white shirt was a “relief,” I would say.

Beyond What Meets the Eye

But a rewind button doesn’t exist.

Life is beyond making the right decisions. The world will tell you that you have to make sure that you’re making the right decisions, preventing disappointment and heartbreaks. It’s not merely about taking chances. There’ll be one point in your life when you feel like being dead-fallen in deep regrets. You’ll try to comfort yourself to move on. But if you’re not careful, you may move on yet with resentment  toward your own self, condemnation, and fear.

Chances & Regret

If I could wish for something right now, I’d wish for a rewind button.

Worse. Taking the wrong chances is worst. It was better not to take any chances than taking the wrong chances. Once you took the wrong chances, there’ll be great possibility that you’re unable to take the right chances. Regret eventually comes, and there’s nothing you can do but wish that you could have listened. You could have been wiser. You could have followed your heart instead of your logic.

So Beautiful. So Unusual.

You’re dime. Top of the line. Words can’t define.

You’re running through my mind all day.